January 17-21

I apologize for not having posted this past week, but you have to understand that it was finals week and I had to study (there you go, that one should make you laugh for a while). However, I took some time off my busy schedule and wrote down some things that happened during the week, but I'm not sure what day they happened so I've made an entry for the whole week. I hope you understand and you don't stop reading the blog because of this minor detail (yeah, as if anybody reads it anyway).

During advisory we were fooling around (no surprises there, then), and Carlos started with his routine of hitting guys where it hurts the most (if you're not clever enough to figure that one out then I'll spell it out for you: in the bollocks (and if you're vocabulary isn't as expanded as to know that words then I'll put it even easier for you: in the balls)). Anyway, he starts out hitting people and what not, and then he suddenly lunges for Tiny and smacks him "there", to which Tiny reacts with "ouch! es mi unica bola...!" and the rest of us guys just stare at him with this confused face... so Tiny only has one ball, that explains various things (none of which I can think of off the top of my head, but there must be something). We later bothered him about his uniball, but well, it wasn't much fun as he admitted to it and it's kind of mean to make fun of people's birth defects (or did he lose it doing something...?), so we (fine, I) stopped.

Also during advisory, Mr. Rasmuson noticed that all the girls were missing, and you know Mr. Rasmuson, he always looks for people and brings them to advisory. There'll come a time when he finds one of us just as the bell rings, and I wouldn't bet against him taking us over to his room, put us inside, and then let us go, just out of spite. Anyway, Rasmuson looks around, pauses for two seconds and a half and says "I'm going to go find the girls... come on, let's find them, they're having girls' clubs." That's right, the Girls' Club... that's the club the meets in the bathroom every advisory period and plan out ways of pissing off the CIC staff and more efficient ways to cheat their way into anything they want. Yup, that club.

Okay, I have to admit that everything happened during advisory. This time we were talking about choking methods (I told you we were productive) and then somebody made a suggestion to Maurizio to use his left hand (you know, after so much activity you can have problems with your right hand from overuse, as Maurizio knows). Then we remembered that Maurizio can use both hands with equal ease (yeah, he's an ambidextrous, allegedly)... and now you know what we were thinking... Maurizio using both hands at the same time to maximize the pleasurable experience... just imagine the speeds he can reach (on second thought, don't imagine that).

Old Fun

I guess it's about time to make fun of Calabria for a change, so here's a story that dates all the way back to 7th grade. If you try and remember our times in the 7th grade, you will remember that once upon a time we had a Geography teacher that went by the name of Ms. Steele. It was one of those days, when all you want to do is just tape your teacher's mouth with duct tape and put your head on your table and just sleep. You've all had the urge to do that, I'm sure of it. However, Calabria was bold enough to actually do it (for the exception of taping Steele's mouth, although there would've been no objections if he had tried). Later on in class, Steele stops talking about whatever it was she was talking about (probably about how cold Russia was) and says "well, I hope you can all enjoy this class as much as Miguel (Calabria)" and Calabria wakes up in a huge shock to see that Steele had caught him napping. I bet that's an experience he'll never forget, although now when he reads it he's likely to laugh it off, unlike at the moment.